Should gay or lesbian partners have the same right as my wife and I to visit each other when critically ill in ICU? If not, why? Because of the religious beliefs of some people? The word "establishment" in the First Amendment means there shall be no law to codify religious views on which citizens differ!
Early as a social worker I realized that some of my colleagues were probably homosexuals. They worked just like everyone else, we depended on each other, they were team players, and they were fine friends. I realized they were likely homosexual, because in my social work training our class in the 1960s asked that our faculty help us learn about homosexuality. That was before it was the issue it is now and was not in our study plans. In a day long teach-in we listened to and questioned some homosexuals and psychologists and others. One of the gay men told us the secret ways that gays communicated, without fear that straights will understand. One told some gay humor.
Once I was in the work world, I recognized that some colleagues were probably gay or lesbian, though I never asked, because, so what? Given the normal distribution of people, likely some of your colleagues or clients or friends are gay or lesbian whether open or hidden "in the closet."
When gays and lesbians "came out" or became public, some church people objected to homosexuality. Their feelings were based on several isolated passages in the Bible. Some church leaders played on their feelings of discomfort, and became fundamentalist moral police who publicly tried to protect the country from gays and lesbians. They convinced voters in some areas to enact laws denying gays and lesbians equal protection in housing, on the job, and in other ways. Thus they tried to make their religion into the law of the land.
Many other leaders and church people were better informed and accepting. As a hymn says, "New occasions teach new duties."
As a retired clergy, I knew that the few statements in the Bible against homosexuality are a miniscule minority, that are easily explained by the cultural environment of the time. So, why are these passages emphasized, while the Bible’s message clearly welcomes people and is concerned for people and for justice.
As an active social worker, I know that most pedophiles are heterosexual. I know that generally gays and lesbians want to live like the rest of us, and are not trying to convert straights. Why are these conservatives not conserving the Bill of Rights, instead of denying these holy rights to gay and lesbian people? I personally believe the Christ of God is deeply offended when people are denied these rights.
I realized that being gay or lesbian is like my being left handed. I was left handed from the get-go, as are most left handed people. As babies we reach for things with our left hand. A few generations ago teachers forced left-handed people to learn to write with their right hands. The results were tragic. These children’s brains were short-circuited. Some continued using their natural hand privately. By the time I started school no more converting the left handed. And later I learned how many of the really creative people through the centuries were left-handed.
Today some want to force gays and lesbians the way society used to force the left-handed — make them like the majority. Many gays and lesbians say they felt attracted to and "fell for" people of their own gender in their early teens, when most of us were fascinated by the opposite gender. That certainly suggests that being gay and lesbian is not a choice, but is like some of us being left handed. And our left handedness does not impact your life in your right-handed world.
So, if you have read this far, a simple question. Fundamentally, why not think about gays and lesbians as you think about left handed people? For centuries left handed people were labeled sinister (really, look in a dictionary) though we really are not! And most gays and lesbians are just like left handed people — wanting to have their privacy as we straights do, and not be the objects of special laws and customs. Gays and lesbians want to visit their partner in ICU just as husbands and wives get entry. They want equal housing and job protection — to be treated just like the rest of us with the same privacy as the rest of us — able to adopt children and be foster parents. Why do conservatives feel a mission to deny basic human rights? When will they come after us sinister left-handed people?
Within churches today welcoming and ordaining gays and lesbians causes conflict. The Bible clearly accepts slavery, which we now condemn. The New Testament in a few places expects women will be silent, but my faith tradition is deeply enriched by clergy women some of whom are now bishops! Gay and lesbian clergy are effective, but often must deny their souls or selves and appear straight. In my ideal church gay and lesbian couples can show their caring for each other just as hetero couples do, and clergy's orientation is irrelevant.
About gays and lesbians and left-handedness, perhaps think of this slogan on my desk: "!Left is always right."
While some Americans think homo- and heterosexuals are different, the reality is that we are a continuum. Though some at one extreme are thoroughly homo and at the other hetero, the majority have some of both. Most of us have very close friends of both genders that we find attractive, pleasant, fun to be with.
The "rainbow cross" are made by a few individuals and include at the center the triangle homosexuals had to wear under Hitler when many were sent to death camps. To buy some contact me by e-mail: john (at) yeaperson com.
Copyright © 2002, 2006 John F. Yeaman
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